yeah, i havent posten in a *really* long time. i notice that. i dont care though. xanga is dumb, and myspace is so much cooler. www.myspace.com/xoctober_nightsx yeah. a lot cooler. no one really reads this, so i guess thats why im choising to post in here today.

yesterday, i looked in the mirrior. and i saw a whole new person. i didnt see little chubby face raine. i saw raine, the cheerleader, the shy, and bitchy girl. maybe it was because i had just got done bitching at this kid alex. im not quite sure what i said. but im not happy that i did it. i hung out with this kid hunter friday night. it was akward. because for some reason i was acting really shy. thats not like me. has my slef esteam (not that i ever had that much) gone away with the "old me?" Going into a new school is going to be a really interesting experience. im kinda happy that im gett a chance to wipe everything clean....its like im making a new me. i dont look anything live i did my 8th grade year. ive lost a lot of weight (the healthy way)...my hair is different...and i cant really explain it all. im just nbot me. ive noticed that i dont act the same...which may or may not be a good thing. the only thing i worry about is making friends. i had no trouble making friends at CCS back then. but ive changed. i dont know if i like it. i hate how people talk about other people as the "pretty popular group" or "the hot jocks" i hate it...its really an uncomfortable thing. ive never had to deal with that. i dont want to belong to a "group" but its going to happen. a lot of the people i already know are awesome to me. and i love them tons.i only hope that it will be the same once school rolls around. this summer has been a huge blur....cheerleading. garrett. brendan moving out. jen moving in.oim really scared. im scared to start highschool but i cant show that. i have to have confidence, something ive never had a lot of in my life. but i can do it.

*me*

( ) smoked a cigarette ( ) smoked a cigar ( ) smoked anything else ( ) crashed a friend's car (x) been in love (x) been dumped (x) shoplifted ( ) been fired ( ) been in a fist fight (x)snuck out of parent's house (x) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back ( ) been arrested ( ) made out with a stranger (x) gone on a blind date (x) lied to a friend ( ) had a crush on a teacher (x) skipped school ( ) slept with a co-worker ( ) seen someone die ( ) been to Canada (x) been to Mexico (and im going again!) (x) been on a plane ( ) thrown up in a bar (x) eaten Sushi (x) been snowboarding (x) been moshing at a concert (x) been in an abusive relationship (x) taken painkillers (x) love someone right now (x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by (x) made a snow angel (x) had a tea party (x) flown a kite (x) built a sand castle (x) gone puddle jumping (x) played dress up (x) jumped into a pile of leaves (x) gone sledding (x) cheated while playing a game (x) been lonely (x) fallen asleep at work/school ( ) used a fake ID (x) watched the sun set (x) felt an earthquake (x) touched a snake (x) been tickled-im so ticklish!! ( ) been robbed ( ) robbed someone (x) been misunderstood (x) pet a reindeer/goat (x) won a contest () been suspended from school ( ) had detention () been in a car accident ( ) had braces (x) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night (x) had deja vu (x) danced in the moonlight (x) hated the way you look (x) witnessed a crime (x) pole danced (x) questioned your heart (x) been obsessed with post-it notes (x) squished barefoot through the mud (x) been lost (x) been to the opposite side of the country (x) swam in the ocean (xxxxxxxxx) felt like dying (x) cried yourself to sleep (x) played cops and robbers (x) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers (x) sung karaoke (x) paid for a meal with only coins (x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't ( x) made prank phone calls (x) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose (x) caught a snowflake on your tongue (x) kissed in the rain (x) written a letter to Santa Claus (x) been kissed under a mistletoe () watched the sun set with someone you care about (x) blown bubbles () made a bonfire on the beach ( ) crashed a party ( x) have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people (x) gone rollerskating/blading (x) had a wish come true ( ) humped a monkey (x) worn pearls ()jumped off a bridge (x) screamed "penis" in class ( ) ate dog food (x) Told a complete stranger you loved them (x) sang in the shower (x) had a dream that you married someone (x) glued your hand to something ( ) got your tongue stuck to a pole (x) kissed a fish (x) worn the opposite sexes clothe s (x) been a cheerleader (x) sat on a roof top ( ) madeout at a church (x) screamed at the top of your lungs (x) done a one-handed cartwheel ( x) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours (x) stayed up all night ( ) didnt take a shower for a week ( x) pick and ate an apple right off the tree (x) climbed a tree ( x) had a tree house (x) are scared to watch scary movies alone ( ) believe in ghosts (x) have more then 30 pairs of shoes (x) worn a really ugly outfit to school ( ) gone streaking. (x) played ding-dong-ditch (x) played chicken fight (x) been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on (x) been told you're hot by a complete stranger ( x) broken a bone (x) been easily amused (x) caught a fish then ate it (cooked yes, uncooked no lol) ( ) made porn (x) caught a butterfly (x) laughed so hard you cried ( x) cried so hard you laughed (x) mooned/flashed someone (mooned my friends older bro.) (x) had someone moon/flash you (my friends older bro. mooned me! lol) (x) cheated on a test (x) forgotten someone's name (x) slept naked (x) French braided someones hair (x) gone skinny dippin in a pool ( ) been kicked out of your house

heyyyy

yeah, i never write in here. i just like reading other peoples' xangas. Im goin to mexico in 4 days! yay! and i get to work on my tan from costa rica. yes. i graduated middle school. how exciting is that? its awesome. the graduation was a lot of fun. but very long. my outfit was awesome. and i did my hair. i looked so awesome....yeah. ive never used a curling iron before that night.  im going to miss everyone a lot. im gonna miss all my friends, and all the teachers. i wont miss noah...because i have to go to school with him next year....grose. lisa has been a real bitch. im tired of her. i used to really lke her but im getting fed up with her and her "im better than you. ahd she hopes well still be friends in hischool...hahahahaha my ass. im leaving for mexico ...like i said. im going to miss leirik. so much. he laves for disney world after i leave....then he wont be back when i get home. im going to miss him so bad. i love him...so much. xoxoxox.....hugs and kisses for you leirik.

Me.

Hey everyone!
Long time no update eh? yeah, well i got back from costa rica on saturday. i had an aweosome time....i took a lot of pictures, but they like ALL suck...I HATE DISPOSABLE CAMERAS!! i got a nice n sexy tan....hehe not really but still. its kick.....ass (hehe tess) it was wild...and kinda dumb at the same time. Noah and karyn started going out...and that was pathetic, neither of them have ever had a real girlfriend or boyfriend. so that was one of the dumbest things. it was cute while it lasted.  i went sea kayaking...that was awesome. if you get out far enough, the people arent visable, and all you see is the coast line...SO BEAUTIFUL!i also saw some awesome flowers and such. the ecolodge where we stayed had awesome food...yes, it was so yummy you dont even know.  one day we went and helped them make tortillas...oh...those r grose by the way...but it was fun making them. On the last night at the ecolodge another group from washington came. they were dickwads...and they were really mean to camy (the mentally ill girl in my class.) but we also met some really cool costa rican kids, and played soccer and volleyball with them...it was a lot of fun. At the beach house we had our own special pool! whoo hoo. it was awesome....and all for us. one morning we got woken up by some howler monkeys in the trees above our house...hehe they were so cute! Saturday night after i came back i went to the student film fest. that was really cool...some of the videos kicked ass...and some of them were just dumb. like this one about lincoln....eegghhh totally silent. annoying. boring.long.dumb. Going back to school on Monday was hard going back. Thank god that all were doing is working on portfolios....but thats hard too.  Reflections suck. Last  night i went to tumbling (i love tumbling)...then to get a free physical at the highschool. that took forever...i think the entire school was there. it was madness. it took 2 hours of waiting in line....Yuck. atleast they didnt make me take off my pants....im glad im not a guy....."Turn your head to the left and cough boys!!!" This morning i didnt go to school because i am going to some shawod thing at the highschool with rhiannon? egh, i dunno. it shall be interesting.

im off

xoxoxox
Raine-y